Regardless thnx for trying to help out, I realize we are dealing w/ very stupid girls here
How far into the semester do we have to be before it's ok to get drunk in between classes again?
is there a reason why there is cup of piss in the fridge?
no
her cat watched me eat her out... I would use the alternate term for both of those things but it's too weird.
I have an excuse to be a whore in Mexico. I'm conducting an experiment to see if small dicks are caused by the poor drinking water.
It's not that drunk me is smarter; it's that sober me is secretly playing for the other team.
I don't see what kind of idea someone could get from an envelope covered in jesus stickers and a note from a person and their dog. I'd say crazy person alert before flirting.
I gave him head in my cape. On the kitchen floor. Watching a show about bacon.
She told me a motorboat isn't successful unless they come out gasping for air. MISSION ACCOMPLISHED!!!
I watched her follow him out of the bar, chase him around the corner and literally throat punch him. It was awesome.
Got a text that the fed tax return dropped into my account just before getting on the first leg of my flights the Vegas. Fate? Viva Las Vegas!
No it was good. I serenaded the holding cell occupants with a fabulous rendition of Making Love out of Nothing at all. It was fucking amazing!
You just kept screaming "PLEASE YELL CORNDOG AT HIM. PLEASE. CORNDOG."
I had a dream that I had to take a breathalyzer but then it turned out to be a bong....why can't that be real life?
There are no winners in a lube eating competition.
Randomize
