Let's make love on the newspapers that declare financial doomsday
dude beer before liquor = i want to shoot myself in the face
were with a gay guy with a minnesota accent. think about how funny that sounds.
He has 250 profile pictures. Of course he was a douchebag
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
this is the second time in my life i thought i might need to go to rehab. im including all the mornings that i wake up in dewey beach as "the first time"
I'm glad we are bonding over both contracting clamidya. Winners.
100%
Fuck your 100 proof Hot Damn. Do you know what 100 proof vomit tastes like? Anger.
Can we please start going to the gym before I accidentally kill someone via explosive fat girl pants button accident
Oh we were great hosts that night. We made sure to leave all the beds open by passing out on the bathroom floors instead.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
btw, whatever u do, dont try and take that towel away from her..i tried, it got ugly..she said some things im sure she regrets.
So here's my pathetic thought of the day: what does it smell like to be sober?
I just spilled grey goose in my hair. You could say I keep it classy for the family Christmas parties.
i found waldo and immediately set him to work eating me out. please have more out of season costume parties.
we had a "who's sex playlist is better?" fight.....
last night i fell off a barstool and busted my nose. i can regretfully say that i didn't see cherub last night.
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