She seriously needs to find another hobby other than bouncing on cock.
What. The. Fuck. No, you will not spank me.
That wasn't intended for you, my bad.
On a scale of 1 to last weekend, how hungover are you?
My own vomit just splashed me in the face. How's your day going
We just had to use a designated driver to get to night class.
It's a bathroom floor kind of morning.
So apparently we dropped beers outside the apartment last night, and someone RETURNED them! Ha like what? I just walked out the front door to Christmas in a box on my doorstep.
It's like a double rainbow in both sides of the sky mixed with The Jeffersons.
thank you for extending my knowledge of the effects of vodka. speak of what happened last night and i will kill you and send your fingers to your loved ones.
I honestly think she should have her own reality show called "Lowering the Bar" and it consists of a camera crew following her from Bar to bar hooking up with unsuspecting drunk attractive men.
Speaking of, what are you doing next weekend? I'm going to a rope bondage seminar and may need a partner if my date bails.
I just took a condom out of my purse and opened it in front of my entire family because I thought it was a wetnap. Way too hungover for family brunch.
You threw away your W2 to make more room in your purse for liquor.
Can’t fucking wait for Tuesday night. Have another situation that popped up. I swear my life is like a cross between a soap opera and a porno
I'm covered in bruises and scratches. I dont know whether to call them battlescars or sex decals
Randomize
