He is fucking rediculously sexy. DO HIM NOW. NOW. NOW. NOW.
He is like the real live version of the state fair..
I just puked in a penis shaped cake pan. I've hit an all new low for a Tuesday.
we were hanging out in his room and he decided to play WoW.. so i took off all my clothes while he wasn't paying attention and laid on his bed and started playing with myself.
did he notice?
of course he didn't notice.. he was playing a fiesty level 1 fucker that wouldn't give up..
Ive been using palmolive to shower with for he last week, dont tell me about not having money. Im heading to the bar r u going.
the threesome consisted of him fingering dana while i laid next to them watching how i met your mother.
at least the cop wrote "happy birthday" on the ticket.
He's going to regret telling me he doesn't care if i shave or not...
I can't believe you broke a Paula dean wooden spoon over my ass
I woke up naked in my bathtub at 5:30 this morning. There's legit a spray tan body print of me in the fetal position in my tub.
We didn't talk. I watched you drop an egg on the floor. And watched you praise your haunted broom.
I didn't know what happened last night until the bruises in the shape of hands showed up on my boobs. Then it all made sense.
We could have had it all. And by all I mean sex in your Toyota Corolla.
I'm gonna eat you out. But for science
The groom's brother was an accomplishment. Then I remembered he was also the officiant. Check and check.
Randomize
