4:33 am: Sleep on left side of my bed. T-shirts are second drawer on left side, boxers top right. I don't wake up when lights are on so feel free in my room..
Are we in a gay sports bar?
We waved. But it was a "let's hook up" wave.
Nvm, he just almost drank his drink from last night, his drink that has the condom in it. Kinda answers my question.
Nick is about to bring home a woman who is 39, a mother, and, by all accounts, FUCKING HOMELESS. Will update as details become available.
Breaking into his house to steal the sheets I'd drunk pissed on before he got home was not how I wanted to be spending spring break
New reason to drink: alcohol makes soda taste like goddamn gold.
I didnt finish. My brain kept playing the duck tales theme thru the entire blow job
Yeah but sometimes your vagina needs to be fed and when we are drunk we tend to eat junk food
How did it feel to just observe all the people blacking out usually you're on the other end of things
I felt like I was at the zoo
What good is being a girl if you can't terrorize boys with pregnancy scares??
I woke up with gum stuck to my nipple piercings this morning.. So there's that.
Do you think my laundromat will notice that the bloodstain on my sheets is in the shape of a face?
Based on my calculations, I should be blackout by approximately 11:14pm and that's when I need you to take my phone away from me. Mkay?
Pandemic Silver Lining: cheap hotel rates makes it easier to have afternoon fun with my side dick
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