i walked into his room and he was eskimo kissing his weed..
Now I'm watching The History of Sex on the History Channel. They're talking about how repressed the 30s were. I think I understand why grandma is such an angry person.
I am gunna fuck the accent right out of her mouth
Bad idea. College students cannot afford both alcohol and a cat. Unless said cat is irish, and can feed itself with fifths of whisky.
i could have sworn she did an overextended split with her legs over her head but now i think it was just the drugs
his dick makes me think maybe a monogamous relationship forever is possible.
You were yelling in my ear let's double team her with her right next to us
He should be castrated
Nah he might accidentally come while they're cutting it off. Wouldn't be fair to the surgeons
If that's all it takes to cure your hangovers then you need to drink more.
You're not stopping till I see you on the ground trying to hold on to shit
No longer is one of my lifelong dreams to ride in a kangaroo pouch. You have eternally ruined that for me. Thank you.
Today in French class my teacher was singing "what does the fox say" so i started answering in similar satanic ritual noises
Let's get a hotel room this time. I really don't want to sleep in a Dennys parking lot again.
I HAVE 5 FELTING NEEDLES AND THEYRE GOING DIRECTLY INTO YOUR EYES IF YOU POST THAT SHIT
Just showered and cleaned every bit of sex off of me cuz i have a feelin my stepmom has jesus powers and would be able to smell it on me
Randomize
