Her body is shaped like a coke bottle...a two liter coke bottle
K, im just throwing this out there, i am not making out with any of his friends... Especially the cross eyed one.
Encyclopedia Brown and the case of the missing condom.
I hope Brown isn't a clue to its whereabouts.
WIFE SWAP. FAMILY OF MIDGETS. LIFETIME. NOW.
They pulled him over whille he had a fish tank full of beer in his front seat. He told them it coudn't count as an open container cause the top was on it.
i was about to cum until he started doing shrek impressions.
I dont care about anyone or anything else I just want to make love to you on my air mattress
his phone is always ringing though. It makes me feel like I'm dating a doctor who's always on call.
yeah, dating a doctor sounds much better than fucking your drug dealer.
Good afternoon everyone! Just texting to inform you that Andrew, your emotionally detached man-whore, will be back starting this weekend. Please RSVP.
well after pounding on the ceiling for 5 mins i just went up there to tell them to shut up.. 2 hours later i'm naked, high, lying on their kitchen floor. it escalated so quickly
People are stripping in McDonalds. Do I join?
YES.
Champagne pong turned into an expensive and painful experience.
I can get stoned and we can bake and then I can eat 70% of it and it will be awesome
I just look at my butt and see so much potential.
You are lucky that I'm drunk. Otherwise I would bone you into another universe
Randomize
