Me. At least after what I've been through.
i threw up in over 4 different places last night. it was like a world tour
ok please explain why some one shaved half of my pubes?
girls just need to accept the fact that i'm going to make out with their boyfriends
Ya know, in a round about way coinstar is just a glorified vending machine for all my bad choices.
you made sure you came back for your bottle of vodka but didn't remember to take your shoes
Just got a blow job while taking my online quiz. How is life in the dorms treating you?
Haha yeah this costume is worse than I imagined. I look more like a gothic hooker who caters specifically to creepy men with doll fetishes
I don't have any money, so I'm just gonna press my boobs against him for his birthday.
It looks like I colored my belly button red at some point
My mind's like "He's a sexist pig" but my uterus is like "YOU SHALL BEAR HIM STRONG CHILDREN"
If you keep giving me that glorious dick ill bake you some cookies
Oh god...Did I just fuck a sugar granddaddy?!
we tried to make a drinking game out of 4 pokemon cards you found in a drawer.
Next thing I know her tits are out on my desk. It was straight out of a porno. What was I supposed to do I’m not made of stone
Randomize
