Why is it that you only get to have sex when you haven't shaved your legs in six weeks and are wearing period stained granny panties?
Not me. I think "beastiality" sounds pretty classy.
If I saw Perez Hilton naked I think I would stick a lit candle down my throat.
why dont you just whore around college until someone loves you...thats how it works for girls isnt it?
So chef boyardee smells exactly the same after you throw it up
i literally discovered the exact same thing last week. i had the lasagna one
ravioli
mondays should just be called national damage control day
Just had a drunken guest at my hotel threaten to "throw a fuckin fireball at my face"
I mean, keeping the tube socks on AND taking cell phone pictures that he didn't ask for during sex? that's two strikes kiddo.
My hope for you over spring break is that you can be some disease free girl's random spring break mistake.
I'm beginning to think that women just have dogs at home as an excuse to leave ASAP after hooking up, without sounding like a typical guy.
Went on a blind date. Afterwards I ripped my pants off and said "it's game time". He was into it.
I hate who I am becoming
I think of it as growth but I also hate who I am becoming as well
In other news I was masturbating last night and came really fucking hard to the thought of yelling at a customer....
Just stopped at a cross walk because the light turned red 3 streets down. I'm way too high.
How’d it go?
I accidentally joined a cult
So not great...
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