I'm laying in your front yard are you home
well, if it gives you any insight into how crazy it was, i am currently wikipediaing "anullment"
you're out of your mind
you look like daphne blake and he looks like fozzie bear
it's like he rubbed a lamp and wished you into existence
I literally ate my thanksgiving dinner while getting a lapdance. And honestly, after that, there is no other way.
you know you go to a catholic school when you are rollin a joint with matthew 14:1-12
Today I learned you can't titshake with a corset on.
Of course I'm hard in the pics. If there's a chance that these pictures will cause a scandal later in my life I at least want my dick to look it's biggest
I don't care how high you are, you can't finger me while eating potato chips.
My kindergarten teacher served me... All coming full circle
He's def the type to chop us into bits whilst screaming "NAPA BITCH". AKA my type
He has a bathrroom scale in his room with an alarm attached to it so anything over 150 sets it off and in his drinking stupper he can make a run for it.
We've been staking out a taco bell for 2 hours trying to find last night's one night stand
We shall need something stronger. Anal lube, the blood of a giraffe, and a bay leaf should do the trick. Make the paste and cover your left knee and anus in it.
I know it's just really hard to give up sex and cigs during a blizzard
We're starting to light shit on fire, bring a metal bucket. Be prepared, Jimmy's off his meds.
Randomize
