He just "revenge puked" on her kid. I think we'll be leaving soon.
Remember that night I drank a bunch of vodka, pounded your Jameson because 'you were a pussy', punched you in the face and ran off as fast as my high heels could go? It was just my Russian and Irish sides fighting for genetic dominance
By the way I peed in a mug last night cause you were in the bathroom and im pretty sure it is still in the kitchen.
I woke up in a lawn chair by the lake to some man revving his boat motor at me.
I saw a groundgog last night outside my back door. I now have a new wedding gift idea.
Oh my god, it's like someone broke the off button in my butthole
this is the last time i am going to a 7am booty call
I need to wear something that says I would have sex with you but I'm not going to
How weird would it be for me to get 1 hour photos printed at CVS of my partially or all nude?
I looked so sad that Jessica gave me a bar of soap. So that's where I'm at.
Just screamed wow while using my vibrator.. new low
I will find, mount, and marry that person.
There's nothing wrong with using cocaine to keep my heart rate up in my fitness class.
you should come have a drink with me (non alcoholic or otherwise) im at the same bar as your sister and a few guys that would apparently "lick your butthole"-congratulations
Unless you want to see me masturbate, I think skype is a no go for now.
Randomize
