Yeah, i don't remember peeing. or meeting the girl.
He came through my line today and bought designer impostor perfume, just for men gel, and astroglide. I almost DIED.
I introduced him to the male G-Spot. Don't ever tell me I'm not experienced.
I feel the need to clarify that I did not show her my vagina.
I guess it was to be expected that I was put on somebody's list called penis socket.
I created another version of Halloween, it's called swalloween, whatever girl in a slutty costume you bring home has to swallow or forever be known as the holiday grinch
No, I googled it. Apparently, male thongs are the next snuggy and a lot of guys love wearing them for the support.
I think that girl got really offended when I made out with baby Jesus.
WHY IS MY CAR MISSING A DOOR YOU BITCH
budget cuts
YOU CANT BLAME EVERYTHING YOU DO WHILE DRUNK ON BUDGET CUTS
budget cuts are serious business
If the river was whiskey, it would be the best river ever.
it is shots o' clock and I am never late
with the possibility that i could very easily fall in love with him and i've actually talked to my HUSBAND about it
This is even better than the wine from my laundry basket
i think i just lost a toe
That sad moment when the drawer I used to keep condoms in now has poptarts in it..
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