For some reason fuck navy didn't go over quite as well as say fuck michigan;
you kept screaming i cant feel my vagina, it kinda killed the mood.
So this snow storm is NOT helpin my masturbation problem
I'm making a contract of things you're not allowed to put in my ass
The orgasm outlasted the Charlie horse. Pros and cons.
I think I may have accidentally stepped in fire
if this uncomfortable exchange we're having is you trying to flirt with me i suggest you stop it before someone gets hurt
VAL. THIS MOTHERFUCKER IS LAYING IN MY BED WEARING A CAT SHIRT, VAL. COME SAVE ME, VAL.
Idk woke up on the suite in someone else's clothing and actually broke my ankle
At least your vagina gets to vagina again. Dust that thing off.
I am such a fucking liability at weddings. I ended up making out with this married 40-year-old that told me that basically if I came home with him and be a sex partner for him and his wife, I would never have to pay for anything again. Extremely considered it.
We will just distract him with tacos and porn.
You should of known that i was high if i refer to myself as melting into anything
I apparently ooze single. The second I left his house after break up sex five of my old booty calls text me
Lighting a fucking bong with a candle. Straight up dedication.
Randomize
