so he went down on me and i thought i heard him say "you're smelly" to my vagina
i got awkward and finally asked him what he said
he actually said "you want some dick?" to my vagina. which is worse? either way he's talking to it
Things are going great. I have tons of beer, margaritas, and theres an inflatable swan in the mix.
What happened to him?
He was walking right behind us then disappeared.. turns out he checked his luggage at a night club, continued to drink and dance, then slept on the 4th floor of some museum
i go for whatevers easier....i'm bisexual strictly due to the convenience factor
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Just successfully made home fries from potatoes we used as bowls while stoned as shit. I deserve a trophy.
I think she finds the idea of a naked fat man lying on the table and holding our butter offensive
Well I mean he is in a slightly seductive pose
As pissed as she was, you would've thought I was trying to get back into his pants instead of his booze collection.
You wanted to go find him and we told you to sit down cause you kept stumbling. You yelled " I CAN STAND!! It's the walking part I can't figure out!"
That is cause you are some weird type of mutant that lives off of Alcohol.
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Rule #36, branched off rule 4: Dave stays on a leash in crazy settings. It keeps him good and gets you laid.
So essentially he's like a puppy you can bring to a bar? Retractable leash or chain then?
Maybe you can just make seal noises during sex and we can call it good
On a side note, my ex husband offered to buy me shrooms
Just to clear things up, yes you did lick the strippers butt
there is such a gross feeling of satisfaction when the married guy i used to hook up with likes my facebook status.
He told us when he was 10 he started shoving bars of soap up his ass for pleasure so i winked at him
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