Some girl just toasted to friendship and love. I want to break her neck.
i now know how you feel when you have to walk me home. she ran into a streetlight and into garbage.
So theres a slight possibility i may not graduate according to planned because i was out getting laid instead of studying. And im okay with that.
you walked into the kitchen holding the skyy bottle and asked us "how do i warm this?"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wonder what acid is like for a blind person... Can we find this out?
1. Are there men involved 2. Is there food involved 3. Do I have to put pants on 4. Do I have to leave this bed
Toilet is so comfy. Serious question/why does weed make every surface feel like bed?
You peed on someone's house because they had a Wisconsin flag.
I have meat and whiskey. will you bring condoms?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It was marvelous. I was drunkenly conversing with my professor in some of the best Spanish I've ever spoken.
I like how she'll post a picture on Instagram with her boyfriend and 2 hours later you'll send me a snap of her panties on your rear view mirror
I'm trying to be sexual and you're sending me smashmouth lyrics
I swear to God if you fuck my cousin I will fuck your dad.
It's hard to talk dirty with a mouth full of peanut butter
we were running around the halls trying to bloodhound search out the source of the weed smell, but we ran into six other people doing the same thing, and they all said they assumed it was us.
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