and the mascot is a pinecone. its really no surprise that people here dont get laid
Just because i have a masturbation problem doesnt mean you can put 20 photos of Jesus in my room.
I wish you had a penis so you could experience peeing out the window in front of a crowd of people leaving parties.
until you tell me otherwise ill assume we're playing "cavity search" the homeland security game to spice up our sex life
Your my favorite hello and hardest goodbye.
And I especially mean that last part, half the time you pass out somewhere and it is impossible to get you to leave.
He showed up to fuck me at the same time the pizza guy did. It was like everything I needed just showed up at my stoop.
He was going down on me as I discovered a spaghetti-O on my boob. Its been a while since I faked it.
Pretty sure the nurse said at one point I was in full restraints because I tried surfing my stretcher
I'm a gymnast. they should know better than to let me get dunk near anything i can flip on
I normally need adult supervision or a babysitter, but I refuse to let someone keep me from making irresponsible and wrong decisions at the bar on my last bday ill ever have in texas
I'm not having the "why are your fucking my daughter" talk and the "your a drug addict" talk with your mom tonight.
The time to say "now you can't go and be strange about this at work" is not as you are penetrating your coworker. NOW its awkward
enjoying your night?
do dogs like to salsa?
I dont know if that answers my question or not
What time is our conjugal visit?
Umm...who is this?
FINE I guess I'll just drink regular coke like a PLEBIAN.
Randomize
