She just used a chaser for red wine.
One of my preschool students told me today that it's not pollution that makes the water in lakes unclean. It's the hobos. I was absolutely speechless. And just so proud.
Its not even 10am and we are talking about what guys assholes we would finger.
At my wifes high school reunion. Found out her nickname was 'Back Door Brooke'. EVERYONE is calling her that.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm stoned and just shared 4 cookies with this chicks dog
They're raisins though so they're healthy. No worries.
Who was the person who brought the rooster when they won @ beer pong
I may hire someone just to sell my family the drugs they keep asking me for. It's cutting into my doing drugs time.
An hour is enough time for me to get drunk and win a dry hump marathon so I hope you have somewhat similar or better goals
BTW car sex works all the muscle groups. Just sayin. Legs/butt are sore as are arms, back and core.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Aaand now my client contact has seen your boobs.
Nothing warms my heart more than the sight of a naked hockey player in my bed.
I wish I could accurately explain the embarrassment of standing in your bathroom with women's nair on your ass waiting to get in the shower.
I may have just sent her dad a picture of my penis. His name's Myron, right?
I was grinding on my boss last night. So Monday will be fun. That's what's going on in my life right now.
I saw a drunk guy run across the street with an American flag between his buttcheeks.
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