So you maybe wanna hang out again? I could use the $5
Whatever I can do to help stimulate the economy
I like one night stands...theyre like crushes for big kids
my cabbie only has one arm...this can't be safe
Well I tried to steal a golf cart. I fought with the Chick-Fil-A cow. And other things.
I feel like the only solution to this is to get naked and lay in the shower for a hour then see what my penis wants to do.
About six hours after the bottle of smirnoff, I was googling "losing your stomach lining" and calling my mom for help. She has experience.
Well the strippers have danced to goo goo dolls and green day, time of your life. Were all gonna commit suicide.
This costume is too restrictive. The priest and I cannot get it on while I am wearing it.
I can not be a lesbian living on Beaverland.
How long have I been using my debit card as a coaster?
I come from a long history of big boobed German, Swedish, and Irish women. And then there's me. Mother nature was like "Naaaaaaah."
one more hour of this work bullshit and I'm off to get high with your cat.
It's like all the guys I keep around if I wanna have sex with all got mad at the same time. I guess I'll get out my vibrator again.
MDMA, margaritas, mashed potatoes and ice cream aren't keto Kristin
My thoughts mid terrible hookup: do people normally read a magazine right about now?
Randomize
