I fink we're distracting them from bumping the proverbial uglies
i fucked some guy last night. i called him nick jonas by mistake. i'm 24.
there are singles shoved down my panties. this is the type of summer job i always wanted.
I caught myself masturbating while watching a baseball game today. It was over before I realized what was going on. And then I was just confused.
i had just passed the point of no return when my mom opened my door. I hid my dick and took the porn off the computer in time but i still had to explain my day at school to her WHILE i was jizzing in my pants.
Haha its ok. When we got back you sat in the car and attempted to tell me in sign language you were blacked out lol
im almost positive that in mid thrust she told me she was pro choice
Remember the time we were in the hospital and I wanted to steel the arm restraints and use them as sex toys?? Oh college memories....
He's still filling me in on the details. mid-table dance i asked to go water skiing?
Bring condoms and burritos. The rest will fall into place
I send him pictures of my tits whenever I feel like he's paying too much attention to his girlfriend.
I have bite marks all over my ass. Is that an acceptable excuse for missing class?
This will always be remembered as the Christmas I had 15 Russians sing christmas carols to me at 130am alone in a gas station while I was stoned on pot brownies
Well I mean enduring a 45 minute conversation about C-sections was worth the 9 jello shots those soccer moms gave me.
you were so high you asked for half double stack and half crispy chicken sandwich "welded together" in the wendy's drive through
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