whats a polygalesbian?
lesbian polygamists..duh.
do you believe in love at first sight?
awwwwww =)
yea.. so can i have your sisters number? thanks!
It's like the water temple from zelda. but with more tits.
He made me pinky-promise that he gave me an orgasm.
September 16th, captains log. I awoke in a daze, not sure of my location
You only ask me to come over when your gf is gone, and thats usually at midnight to cook chicken salad and watch you pass out
using blue streamers we found on the bathroom floor was probably not the best substitute for toilet paper.
A group of drunk Marines just serenaded me, never leaving this place
Is it weird that I noticed my lower half feels strange and then further realized it's bc I'm wearing underwear to bed for the first time in weeks..maybe months?
What does it say about my expectations if I'm pounding three beers the hour before a date?
Thank you for trusting your ovaries to me
He was cheering for me from the end of the bar as I sloppily ate a Ruben sandwich. It made me feel really special.
How do u explain to your grandma that your relationship status is hooking up with randoms at a bar
I'm hungover and eating lunch at an elementary school. The children are barking. Litrealy barking, like dogs.
I was totally going to fuck him and then his friend walked in brushing his teeth, whipped down his pants and started doing the windmill. Ultimate cock block
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