that's just what I need...drunk ass people throwin hatchets in the dark.
you wouldnt answer to anything but devil's advocate all night.
Some dude just bet me $8 I couldn't smoke a pack of cigarettes in an hour...It sounds stupid, but I really wanna do it. If I survive, I'll have $8 and it'll look good on my resume.
Eating doritas dunked in queso con salas. Salllas. Salska. Salsa. Got it. Shhiitt. Salsa con queso. That's better. I'm hot pink socks.
Is there anything medically wrong with drinking beer from a vagina?
How did the beer even get there in the first place?
That's not what's important right now
I don't know if it was the room or her, but as soon as the pants came off, it smelt like a locker room and old man farts.
we tried to steer you away from them but you just kept yelling 'i need dick' and going back. sorry.
Gravity stopped and i'm discussing Greek philosophy with two guys I don't know. There's someone asleep on me. We need to use their dealer.
I'm sorry, you might have to start setting aside some time in your day for my pussy.
Just made a beer run. At 9am. In my pjs. I should not be graduating today
If you want it you better put a ring on it. And by ring I mean one of my three favorite pies.
this whole "benign brain tumor" is truly a blessing in disguise. I almost want to start bringing MRIs to the bar because sympathy pussy is flowing like the nile
You know you threw a brownie at my head last night. And said you did it to defend the turtles honer....
Vacuum the place before you go out of town there are random glitter cocks everywhere
The bouncers found you passed out on the toilet. They tried to move you but you refused and repeatedly shouted that you wanted to go out like Elvis.
Randomize
