i hope the fucking fire crotch burns his mouth
she pooped in my shower. pooped. woke me up and said she thought she farted but it wasnt a fart i went back 2 sleep and found it hours later. no longer hooking up w chicks my moms age.
Horny girl and non horny girl have different views on life
I just spiked the applesauce. Try to tell me again your party is better.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just witnessed someone getting head in the parking garage. Don't ever tell me Baylor is too conservative again.
Was waiting for the adderal to kick in then realized I had been brushing my teeth for eighteen minuites
We had phone sex and he came in his sink. i will never eat off one of his plates again
I just want you to know that we eye fucked the shit out of someone who just got drafted
I told him I wanted to "ride him like a show pony" I think he gets the picture
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You rolled around in the grass BEFORE we went in and said it was because "ladies love that eau de earth"
We are going to need a water proof camera with a flash....exit routes....lots of booze.....and a tutu for good measure
You don't understand. This could be the last time I shave a star into my vag. Get over here.
As much as I enjoyed playing drunk half naked twister and talking about my daddy issues last time, I'll have to pass.
I love you but I don't want to see you naked.
as a lesbian i'd like to thank joe biden and also america for giving us this absolute MILF for a VP
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