sooooo how many boyfriends is too many?
i just walked into a room at this party and someone yelled "dibs!"...
Just had perfomance review. I was told the best example of my integrity was when I told my boss I was going to fail the random drug test due to my weekend coke binge. She said that took a lot of character.
I had forgotten what it was like to go to all four classes. It's exhausting.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I finally won that bet on when the anorexic girl would pass out at the gym. You owe me 10 now
i was on the fence about his sexual orientation until he referred to his marlboro loghts as "carrie bradshaws"
I think im definitely allergic to shell fish. Or hungover. Probably both.
You were hanging upside down on the subway with your feet in the stirrup handle bars. the children were amused.
by the way- Brandy out of a doggy bowl was AMAZING
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I got my little bro high for the first time... Turns out the two of us stoned together is a mess. We spent 10 minutes trying to communicate with each other using just our eyebrows.
We can't BOTH have terrible sex lives. Get fucked or throw him out.
How is there no taco emoji?! That's some bullshit.
He ate the contents of an ashtray and didn't puke, I think he can handle drinking a fifth to himself.
Just bedazzled a flask, while drinking out of it. Hot glue is EVERYWHERE.
I would give away three of my own ribs to be able to eat myself out.
...ew
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