I hate you but I'm not in hate with you
you'd think he'd be slightly more humble with a penis that small
I am not hooking up with him just to see what his penis looks like.
he suggested i make a website called "cum on molly's face", to "start off my acting career"
An eyelash just fell out into my container of rice. Searching for it, i took a single piece of rice out at a time coming to the coclusion that i should not be this high while eating rice.
i wish my apartment had room service that i didn't have to pay for.
I'm going to skip that pointless convo with Mark, stick with the "we're talking" status, and bone barely legal, borderline gay, preppy guys on the DL.
Its official. Girls from Indiana do not give rim jobs.
i left the icescrapper in his bathroom. i dont remember taking it there, but i remember brushing his hair with it.
Thanks for alerting everyone in our apartment what your one night stand's name is. Could you scream a little louder?
Also, ran into my neighbor across the street. He told me about scheduling his vasectomy. We are officially way beyond the acceptable point for asking his name again.
Me, him and the recently stolen carpet walked down the road and into the strip club. We had to check the carpet with our coats, it didn't mind missing out too much, later the door guy at Subway held carpet during late night sandwich selection.
He accidentally opened the car door during sex and all the lights came on. Needless to say, that kid passing by who was walking his dog got scarred for life.
I just wanna have sex and go to Denny's after is that too much to ask for.
But seriously like how many girls do you know that will do that on the first date?
One?
ONE! And it was was glorious!
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