My mother just asked me if i ever swallow the goods...should i be concerned?
I didnt believe in cockblocking untill my roomate brought home that.
he's been in the country 4 hours and we just did it in the closet. he called me "miss flirtatious in the cupboard." i'm in love.
If you were wondering whether I accidentally FaceTime called the undergrad who works for me in lab during a particularly graphic blow job last night, then the answer is yes.
I guarantee that wasn't the first penis someone placed on her forehead.
dude when im high using logic is an accomplishment that should be rewarded. make sure u get cinnamon twists
Im gunna just be that one ballerina in the low V leopard thong leotard and everyone else can be boring and prude with their little pink tights on.
I can not say for certain that I did not blow someone in the bathroom at the bar at some point.
I smelled him yesterday and almost relapsed he's like cocaine
I watch one musical on Netflix, and the "Suggested for you" section is literally almost the entire gay movie category. I feel profiled, and netflixs' accuracy about my sexuality is both impressive and offensive.
good news: smoking weed at school again, quality of life has improved drastically
No I'm not high but I did cry for over an hour tonight because I realized that they never made a sequel to "Under the Tuscan Sun" with Diane Lane.
Also, I'm not that drunk, but I'm thinking of pulling the blinds all the way up and casting some porn up onto the living room TV to establish dominance over our neighbors.
We just started our own DARE program: Drugs are really enjoyable.
Can I use your boat
Also, what’s the deal with international water? Do they have signs out there like a city does or do I need a map?
WTH is going on? It’s the middle of the night
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