It is pretty awful out and I still haven't put on pants yet.
U know its gonna be a great day when the guy at the liquor store waves at u cause u walked by
called my therapist. she asked if I was sad bc of m.j.'s death. are ppl that pathetic?
you need more empathy. some people get depressed for reasons OTHER than being a whore.
Katie Perry lied, you can't just wake up and shake the glitter off your clothes.
haha the sad thing is i can't decide whats worse. the fact that you're drunk judging a science fair or the fact that i'm really proud of you for it.
I just shotgunned a beer alone in the bathroom...what do you expect from me
He literally said to me "go ahead and answer that text message while I eat you out"... Maybe I AM the relationship type...
Just saw two dudes run across the street carrying a mini keg and a scaled model of the empire state building. Missed this town
I remember desperately screaming that I love my life and running in zig zags all the way home
Xanax and an ambien. And wine. I'm just waiting for mouth to mouth from some hot EMT. Sort of like the slutty girls version of sleeping beauty
So changing channels while she's on top is frowned upon. It's back to thinking about baseball again.
I think it's important to not involve Bar Food in any near future decisions.
He's perfect in every other way. Is buying him a cockring too forward or just honest?
We should get drunk in walmart
when?
20 minutes ago
I have mastered the art of having sex on monkey bars.
Randomize
