whjeg hajt iyt
say what?
wanna hang out?
We're playing Big Buck Hunter to determine who buys the next pitchers. And they said video games wouldn't help me later in life
I just jerked it so loud the neighbor banged on their floor. maybe my wife got the point
Highlight of my weekend: having my card suspended due to "suspicious charges" and standing in line at the gas station yelling at customer service on the phone that I really did go to 4 different strip clubs in one night
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I hope they realize that to me "collecting their mail" is synonymous with "fucking in every room in their house, and twice in the party shower."
how is telling me how long you drunkenly fucked someone supposed to make me miss you?
My internship group is made up of all freshman. Their enthusiasm for education and social interaction sickens me.
Her ass is the reason I still believe in a higher power
Let's play "Guess What I Just Found In My Vagina?"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was alternating between saying "yall need Jesus" and "God bless" the entire night
You kept ranting how Captain Planet is getting shortchanged in the superhero department. Other than that you kept it together
I guess you never know how much of an impact you have on someone until you sleep with their cousin
it's a rainbow of FUCK YOU
He asked me if I've ever had my ass ate and there was no polite way to say yeah your brother's pretty in to that 😂 I went with "no"
I don't wanna be 33 that's when Jesus died
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