Do you think Conan would leave his wife for me?
He just said "I made some changes in my life. The male g-spot is in the rectum and I wanted to explore that."
Two girls down stairs, two girls up stairs and....
We've got ourselves a situation
Shit. Come in my room. Bring a trashcan and an icepack
It's Christmas week. I wouldn't know what to do if i wasn't hung over.
I come back into the room and you're grinding with the person in the mascot suit.
I called him daddy. To his face. Somewhat sober. What more could I do?
He gave me an orgasm before we even reached 2nd base, everything he did in high school is irrelevant.
You're in the clear; you and Andrew did not joint fingerbang that girl on the dance floor last night.
The bend and snap? 98% success rate of getting attention. When used appropriately, it has an 83% rate of return on a dinner invitation.
I came so hard I burst a blood vessel in my eye. If i cant marry this girl, I'm gonna have to switch teams.
I have a 8 minute video of a fish tank on my phone.
We need to stop going to pet stores high.
i feel like a cleansing fire is the only way to purify the house
Just found a handle of Tito's in my TV stand
Can't recall when I put that there, but let's goooo
So... he's my second cousin's step-bro... To do or not to do?
Randomize
