So i had sex for a couple seconds last night
Memo to self- delete texts about butt sex from you before giving my mom my old phone to use.
walking on gravel proved too much for her barefeet so she traded her bra for some guys sneakers.
he was so hot that i framed the used condom. it's not trash, it's art.
haha I love it when I find out that girls who were mean to me in middle school are now some random dude's baby mama. thanks, facebook.
How many 'remember name' entries is it inappropriate to have in one's cell phone?
You were so drunk you decided to go out of the car window instead of using the door, once you realized what you had just done you said fuck it and went back in through the window
They switched jackets and you didn't notice. You made out with both of them and had no idea
When you get home...find me in the shower. Only safe place at the moment.
My boobs are hoarders, they steal food and hide it. Greedy bitches.
I'm trying to drink up the confidence to run in public.
"can you come pick me up from the ikea parking garage i think i slept here"
Twas still the Saturday before Christmas \nAnd it’s still fucking snowing\nAnd Steve wished he slowed down \nOn all the fucking drinking
So I was laying on the couch reading a book and he texted me. All I saw was the image of him spitting on my vagina last night in the moonlight. I gagged.
Help. Why am I so naked?
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