broke, out of weed, out of gas, out of food, and my gf just left me.
you're writing country songs now?
Just made a drug deal by throwing my money to my dealers window and receiving weed the same way. We are the definition of typical lazy stoners.
According to last night if you on the sidewalk at 12 a|m\nYour a WHORE !
Just an fyi, teatherball while wasted might be the hardest sport ever.
You were pretty committed to that cat costume. Between pukes, you would meow and assure people that you just had a hairball you couldn't get out...
so i may have indirectly taught my 13 year old campers how to give blowjobs.
one of them held the wheel while the other one changed her pants. while driving. on the thruway. what
We should totally stay in at new years, have sex and try to time orgasm to the countdown
Just recreated a sandwich from the caf in my own kitchen. Graduation denial at it's finest.
Nothing brings compassion from a group of cafe workers like walking in and asking if they have a 'hangover special'
I found out that rock climbing and alcohol does not go together. Ask my broken arm.
I sent him a tit pic on accident and he replied with "nice ass"
Thursday is not a good day to become a felon... It's bingo night
Fuck it. I'm going for it. You're only young once, right?
You've been saying that for 5 years now. Let me know when the novelty wears off.
So I had this brilliant idea that I would sleep in all sorts of sweatpants and sweatshirts... Apparently I thought I could "sweat" off the drunk in my sleep and that it would make me feel better when I woke up
Randomize
