hey, here's something you don't have worry about since you're a girl: finding crusty cum in your bellybutton.
I'm pretty sure if an eight year old calls you a whore.. it's true. just saying.
I got it! After our exam we take shots for every question we skipped!!!
I don't wanna die...
mom just found 19 empty wine bottles in my closet. i hate spring cleaning
19 Characteristics That Make People Instantly Attractive
I was trying to be really smart and save 10 dollars for each cab there and back. ...so I ripped a $20 dollar bill in half.
I see you've set aside this special time to humiliate yourself in public.
I feel like everyone would be happy with that as a present too. "Oh you got me pussy for Christmas?! How'd you know?!"
Sorry for rubbing my feet on you and repeating "good pony, stay."
It's ok. I will share any beautiful men that I drug and leave unconscious on my bed. I'm that kind of friend.
25 People Confess What They’re Shamefully Attracted To
Is it just me or does the sex still keep getting better? I wasn't crying, my eyes just watered from how hard I was cumming.
do you want me to tag you in the pics from the party?
Hmm. Use your judgment. Bootlicking pics are probably not ok. Otherwise fine.
I can't help the fact that i'm turned on by white boys that look like Jesus
Your vagina doesn't want to be violated with garnishes. I get it.
In the future, could you not call me 'bro' while we're having sex?
I'm literally in my bed still trying to find the energy to take my corset off so I can binge eat oreos