I just set a weed brownie on fire in the microwave.
Successful New Year's Eve:: Your first shower of the year is on Jan. 2nd... 'cause you didn't trust yourself to stand up long enough on Jan. 1st. Hello 2010.
i am breaking up with you. because you wash your hair too much and you only drink light beer and because you're not party enough.
She asked if my windows were tinted enough for road head.
These 19 Underage Drinkers Epicly Got By With A Horrible Fake ID
I just fell down the stairs in the library and further deviated my septum. That's why I don't study.
All I'm saying is that whoever owned the wheelchair clearly didn't need it or they wouldn't have been able to leave it there
Well were gunna have to wash the couch cover now...maybe even the couch, soap or fire your decision
I have to answer enough questions about you, I don't need your uterus tossed in the conversation.
You ruined me. I can't stop referring to everything outside as the "no-walls" ever since you showed me that video while I was tripping balls. My speech may be permanently altered for the rest of earth spins
These Are The 21 Strangest Sexual Fantasy Confessions
Sure. But we have to be quiet.
Ninja mode activated
Surely the maintenance men have seen worse than that condom right
i think i just asked a donut if it was ok
you take my contact solution?
drank it last night then filled it with brandy for the plane ride.
I may or may not be setting up an encounter with a foot fetishist just because I'm curious.
In her defense, she didn't know I had a twin brother. Plus, we're even: I banged her sister.