You know your in college when you decide house chores with games of beer pong...
i did make 45 jello shots and that makes me feel more productive then any paper would
When she talks to me all I hear are 5 generations of inbreeding speaking.
I thought I would take a shower to wake me up but now I'm naked wet and stoned laying on my bed instead of just stoned laying on my bed
we decided to do a scavenge hunt for ourself for when we walked back to our apartments. We hid taco bell behind some bushes. I think they are still good.
i think i can safely say that is the weirdest thing you've ever propositioned me with. so obviously my answer is yes.
Its not personal, its just business. I'm the Donald Trump of blowjobs.
She came to the party dressed as slutty elmo and then called me oscar the grouch for not wanting to bang her in the dumpster outside.
she is way to in-touch with her childhood
So I stappled myself into my toga... that should be interesting getting out of later tonight...
I feel like a pizza delivery girl of vagina tho
Yes sir I did. I'll be there with a guest. And no, my date won't be an escort.
Well if that changes tell the escort to bring cocaine.
DROP EVERYTHING! Gatta go get tested for herpes, lets make an adventure out of it.
I CAN SEE SO MANY PENISES. There are so many visible penises here.
Where are you???
Yoga class :(
Turns out that fresh outta jail dick is quite something.
screwing the intern at work sucks when u find out the boss is too. She is a smoking hot though
Randomize
