my grand plan for the evening is to do shots of vodka til i cant anymore
i'm home, then i'll come over
ightttt gangstaaaaaaaaaaaa
nvm.
One night stand!! Now I'm pissing excellence
That burning is chlamydia
Tell nick i'm sorry for throwing a block of cheese at him last night
I don't think I'm emotionally ready for this blow job.
It's not like I'm never gonna put out again. I'm a sure thing. I promise.
She suggested that I come visit her in Europe and hook up with the heteroflexible Korean who sits next to her in class. Polylove is the best love.
I mean it was his birthday. How was I supposed to tell him he could not wear a sombrero while we bang.
we were looking for paper towels to wrap his hand and i yanked a drawer out of the cabinet, it was fun so we just kept doing it. things escalated and long story short, he isn't gettin his security deposit back
sometimes, you gotta take him by the hands like tails took sonic, and fly him into the bedroom.
When the strippers start dancing to Christmas songs it's time to get the fuck out!
She had a belly button piercing in the shape of a cross. Talk about mixed messages.
We had sex and I never took my mets hat off... I feel like Duda knows and approves.
Seriously though, I walked in and he was holding my cat in the air singing "the circle of life"...
At some point i am going to say to you "i have this really bad idea! You in? " just go with it.
Randomize
