so i realized that everyone figured out i was a slut before i did. then i realized that no one felt like telling me. sometimes i think you just keep me around for entertainment.
you're right.
just got cropdusted by the delivery guy...this was not in my job description.
Lol i'z typing this with my 962 nose
962=my?
Yeah.i
i wanted to be an indian when i was a child. apparently you cannot grow up to be an indian.
Too late. I'm going over there. I'm a bad example for all women: Do as I say, not who I do.
He looks like he has a penis
What the fuck
A good one, a good penis
Just had to throw up on the floor of my car during traffic on the way to work. Car next to me saw both times. Found the downside to having a job right after graduation.
I blacked out after running into my soc TA in the beer garden. came to dancing on the speakers at major lazer and making out with said TA.
Drink for every country you've never heard of.
Fuuuuuuuuuck
you owe me at least a beer for the services my girlfriend just provided for you
My mom opened up my bank statement today....my first alcohol intervention class is at 7:30am tomorrow.
I'll have party bus drop you off in the morning.
He literally took a shit in my bathroom and then broke up with me.
I feel like I should acknowledge that I see you as a human and not a ragdoll sex object
A huge penis doesn't warm the soul. Or that's what I've had to tell myself.
I think one of my ovaries is committing suicide. But that is a topic for another day.
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