Condoms? Check. Glitter? Check. Fuck me pumps? Double check. Dignity? No where to be found. I'm about to homewreck the shit out of that dumb bitch.
I've been meaning to talk to you about your lack of self-respect these days and the toll it's taking on your vagina.
You all can go fuck yourselves. As far as I'm concerned, don't come back to karaoke.
oh well at that point I was already depressed with life because I had watched the bratz movie.
I lost my virginity in that bed. You just layed in history.
airport. 106 proof japanese liquor. 4 little travel size containers. im proud to be smarter than the average american.
I don't remember anything other than how good it felt when I peed my pants.
Held my professor's hair back while she was puking. I'd better get an A out of this or else the pics are going on Facebook.
Saw on the news tonight that Hamilton county's syphilis rate is 9x the national average...use protection!
Thanks, mom.
The van in front of me contains people having SEX. I am in full view of a SEX VAN.
Definitely! I will do that this week. Right now, watching drag queens play with my dad's beard.
Incase you were wondering. Cooking naked turns into sex. Sex and cooking may lead to house fire....
I apparently asked the bartender for a plastic bag and told her I was gunna puke then grabbed two handles from the bar then put the handles in the plastic bag and left.....
Costco cheesecake and whisky. A night made in heaven
First morning at school this semester and I threw up in a bush during my walk of shame.
If this adventure is going to get us arrested it'll have to wait until Wednesday so that I can bail myself out.
Randomize