I finally had kitchen counter sex! i was so excited
If you don't sleep with him after showing him your thong with the bow, I am no longer on your side.
Just ran into that chick u called from my phone and left her a MSG bout how she has aids
Ahaha, good shit
Ok, so for future reference, in Rome, "piano bar" means "brothel".
In case you were wondering, my scare crow is wearing your outfit from last night.
I don't know at least half of his name. I have officially become a statistic.
We are lost and the only things we have are peanut brittle, cookies and vodka. I think we'll make it.
How is it possible that I am in a completely different city, and there are 2 dudes here that I've banged? How????
If you want to borrow my flask for all future interviews as a good luck charm because your last one went so well with it in your suit pocket, just let me know
"guaranteed dick" "anywhere - her room, my room, trees, couch"
Sorry that was quotes about you from the grad student.
I drew a nude short fat middle aged woman today and liked it
It was honestly one of my favorite days in art class except for the 20 min she faced me and kept looking at me and we made eye contact
Question: trumpet bong. Can it work.
The lady at walmart just said she is so happy im still alive....Was i that drunk on the 4th? Dont answer that
I have visions of guys in cheetah costumes with suits over it pissing on a children how are you
I Woke up still tied to the bed. I would say, it was a good night!
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