three words: i give head
three words: not that well
You don't understand, Single Ladies is like the Don't Stop Believing of the gay community.
I think he'd cut a tree down for me. He's from North Dakota. That's something hot guys do there, right?
I went golfing for the first time today!! Aren't you proud?
Driving a golf cart around all day with a keg attatched to the back doesn't exactly count as golfing
She devotes each year to either men or women. I waited all year for her to be straight, tonights the night.
Her only article of clothing is an American Flag
Atlanta road trip update. Jimmy fell into the petting tank at the aquarium. And freaked out. With cops now... Keep you posted
I hooked up with a lesbian tonite. Top 2 valentines experiences of all time.
I think your high point was when the quesadilla was in your mouth and you were screaming "I can't chew!" and the Taco Bell guy just kinda stared at you like he wanted to strangle.
I lost my favorite bra in his hotel room. Is it bad that that's the only reason I hope he texts me tomorrow?
was I atleast graceful when I feel down that flight of stairs and broke my hand?
UPS just delivered me 30lbs of dried cherries... I shouldn't be allowed online when I take painkillers.
Because you put the dick in ridiculously amazing boyfriend. And you deserve to have nice things happen to your penis. That's why.
My history professo slid into my DMs. Granted I did give him “fuck me” eyes during a lecture a few times.
she just kept straddling the railing to the stairs and shouting "come on Seabiscuit, lets win this for America."
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