I took shrooms, thc and molly but its okay i'm surrounded by freaks
No. untill you have done a puke that contains nothing but semen and tequila, you do not 'feel my pain'
Said he made a playlist for taking a shit. only two songs on it are the Star Wars theme and "America, fuck yeah" set to repeat.
I just want dick. Yours just gets priority because it is glorious
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
and here comes the time of my day when I haw to convince a guy to drive my cape and my handle to my dorm.
When the cab driver starts laughing its a good indication of the standard of girls you are bringing home
Did I really drink that whole bottle of Jack Daniels last night?
Heroically.
I went eBay shopping last night. Turns out I brought a Viking drinking horn. I can't even be mad.
There is nothing wrong with me introducing you as elephant dick. Nothing.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Anddon't worry about me I have my Darth Vader flashlight
Hello my rib-scented angel!
I've never seen anyone as high as you were.. you collapsed onto the kitchen floor hugging a tub of ice cream. You named it phil.
He held my hair while I gave him a blow job. Now that's teamwork.
its 11:20. i'm drunk in class flying paper airplanes for my final. what the fuck is my college experience right now?
Someone puked in my crockpot. Your friends can’t come over any more.
Randomize