I hate you, and I hope you have babies soon that you love very much. Then I will steal them and feed them to sharks, and you will be so heart broken that you never want to have any more kids and you'll just hide out in a dark room all day wondering how someone could feed another persons babies to sharks.
Let's hear it for middle of the street handjobs ladies and gentlemen
Her cum face looks like the large marge scene in pee-wees big adventure
I can make a handprint turkey for extra credit in history. I feel like the word college should be in quotes on the school letterhead.
my roomate judo was messing around with a girl who recently had a kid, when he was sucking her tits milk came out lmao
have u ever looked at the reflection of the water n watched the poop come out of u?
why can't you just be normal
Just saw a drunk guy marching down the strip with a garden rake. I feel compelled to follw him
There were slices of bread pasted to the wall with peanut butter this morning. I don't want to know
I just Tebowed the shit out of her.
Nice and you can't use "Tebow" in the place of every verb.
My goal for tonight is to swipe my debit card through those weird rolls on the back of a big bald guy's head.
They fucked on my pong table last St. Patty's and broke it. I feel like I should be hiding my new one. Would hate for a tradition to form.
I'm sitting in my 10 am lecture drinking a flask out of a dorritos bag...I think people are starting to notice but I'm already too drunk to care
He puked in the middle of it and I still wasn't disappointed.
I mean if you can't appreciate a good looking dick then just get out.
and idk now I have nine bags of lettuce in my fridge
Randomize
