All I know is that if italians start TIME TRAVELLING were all in a lot of trouble paizon
he said i was weird because i want to have sex in public places.
i dont think thats weird i think thats fun
i forgot to tell you, he fell asleep outside my house again last night, but im weird
It must have been true love
I don't call true love eating a bag of doritos and then going down on each other
I hate when people I sell to add me on Facebook. I'm your dealer, not your friend, C'mon people.
only 75% of american men are circumcised...i guess this was bound to happen to me someday.
You just kept rubbing her head and repeating "I really like your head, I want your head..." over and over for like 10 minutes straight... And she didnt even stop you.
We JUST got rid of the new years fatties at my gym and now the spring break fatties are here. goddamn.
You definitely in your drunken state were really concerned you would forget to buy milk today
Listen I'm a sentimental character under all this alcohol and ratchetry
Did you clean his pubes up off the table yet?
JUST DENIED A NEW YEARS KISS BECAUSE HE WAS A COWBOYS FAN.
I got my period on eclipse day. I'm officially in line with the moon.
are you really asking me this. do you KNOW how many times i masturbate in a day? yeah. wrong person to ask about romance.
I’ve developed a strange interest in ear wax removal vids on YouTube. Dear god, I need to get a job
I sort of feel bad for this orthodontist. The things that have been in my mouth in the past 12 hours aren't exactly socially acceptable.
Randomize