Whoa Z and x make the same sound
Lowest moment of my life just occurred. I literally threw up all over myself in front of my parents.
She keeps stunt undies in her bag, 2 sizes too small. She leaves them behind so the guy thinks he was luckier than he was...
Being a responsible DD does not include attempting to coordinate a 4 taxi caravan to bar #3
I was expecting a blowjob when she shoved me in the bathroom but instead she shaved my pubes into a mustache for my penis. I am still satisfied.
I'm currently looking through google images of circumsized penises and realizing how vital pre-marital sex is.
He raised his arm and dropped it in his sleep to smack himself awake. He knows his phone has an alarm clock right?
I blacked out at work again... Except this time my boss watched me throw up by the bus stop and some woman let me sleep on her shoulder for an hour. Why does this keep happening?
Packing a mid day bowl in the Sonic parking lot. Have I gone too stoner?
i really need to shower, but i don't want to take off my bra and lose my cleavage. the struggle
I've literally exhausted all the videos on pornhub. It took like 4 years, but I've done it. I did that quicker than I finished college
Hey, YOU try working out drunk every night! Besides, I think at least one of those bruises is a hickey.
when I was walking home I wad so excited to see a cat on the sidewalk but it was really a traffic cone
yeah i'm making him "thanks for letting me befriend your toilet" cookies. wanna help? i'm sure you'll be making new friends too.
I don’t mind that he’s uncircumcised. It’s the fact that he talks about the Bible immediately after we have sex .
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