I knew she could be a good mother by the way she craddled three 40oz's.
we may have ended up at a gay bar on accident. we're gonna work this to get free drinks.
Is it weird that I want your dad to go down on me?
We left an ass print on the piano.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm not holding out much hope. She met me in a nighclub when I was arguing with the cigarette machine
Was this before or after he told that homeless man outside the bar about his past sexual experiences?
I hope my orgasm sounds aren't secretly that bad and no one tells me
How does this dude know what a dying walrus sounds like? That's the real question
Have a glass of wine with dinner they said. Your hydrocodone has worn off they said... NOPE
This is a whole new generation of premature ejaculators
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I only blacked out one night of three if that isn't fucking personal growth idk what is
I just farted so loud someone came to check on me. Thought something fell in my office.
I never thought I would be saying these words but...when did David Spade get hot?
why isn't there a kind of gay where i let guys give me head but they don't expect me to give it back? i could be that kind of gay
He was that good?
Anyone who can sit 4 hours in a doobie circle with their feet in a kiddie pool is ok by me
I dropped my pants and she just stared until she asked how is that even possible? Best night ever lmao
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