I'm twenty-five. I'm too old to be watching my friend throw up in Chipolte Parking lot.
yeah he didnt know till after their one year. You have no idea how bad i wanna say "dude i sucked on those boobs before you"
because whats more american than sleeping with a westpoint cadet on the 4th of july?
We're friends with people in his circle of friends so we're half way in. It's like I've already given him a hand job.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I swear to God, I just heard my guardian angel tell us to stop. I think we should listen.
Thats the worst face I've ever seen you make an I've seen you throw up in your own hair.
Call me when you get back form court. Hopefully its not later than noon. Just remember..win or lose we still booze.
Dude he was freaking out because he thought he was walking on crates, and he just kept saying help me
After a certain point, you just want to make it work. Prove to yourself that you're smarter than the vibrator.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Go forth Daniel, drink, be merry... And meet some hot Asians for your friends to bang
He has a lot of emotional energy invested in your vagina.
I just want to be like i dont know you but ive seen your penis & i like it
How is it that I, the only one that didn't drink last night, was the only one puking out the car window?
He dared you to draw a map of the USA on your wall in mustard. You drew something that vaguely resembled a velociraptor eating Oklahoma, got embarrassed because you forgot how to spell America, then hid out in the coat closet until everybody left.
finals do horrible things to a person. i haven't worn pants since friday
Randomize