my weekend in 10 words or less: hot friend of a friend, open bar, beach house, sore. In that order too.
were not allowed back there because i puked on the waitresses foot while trying to order another round. for myself.
dude i doubt hes gay
I CAUGHT HIM BEATING OFF TO MENS HEALTH!
but why does your life always sound like the plot of a porn?
They just gave us root beer floats. I guess I won't quit my job today.
that cunt stole my fb status. SHE'S NOT THAT FUNNY
Would it be safe to assume you're the one that left my front door wide open and left yourself a trail of jaeger drops to find your way back?
Hey. Hope youre not too hungover. Also, did you put a Christmas tree in my guest bathroom and cover it with condoms?
Skip school. Seven hour blow job Plus Disney movies. Day of champions
Left and drinking by a bar by myself. Everyone is in pajamas. I'm in a tuxedo. This is my life.
Let the record show that the first hour of my twenty-first was spent shooting tequila ans discussing the emotional integrity of werewolves.
Well ill be drunk so just come find me. Its like where in the world is Joey San Diego
Thank you for listening to my rant about tacos.
all I remember is grinding on everyone in the room regardless of gender and quoting the lion king non-stop. We need to stop buying Jameson.
That confirms what we've all known all along. I'm a bad gay. I have no fashion sense.
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