I bought a boat. Want to have sex on The Angry Clam? That's what I named it.
Best walk of shame ever - Brown Hennesy shirt, bright blue overly large basketball shorts, stilettos from night before - ended up buying a ton of 40's and a 30 pack of coors.
Where are you?
A place I should not be.
every time I worry about a career mistake, I remember Michelle Pfeiffer did Grease 2.
We all need desperate help. Maybe we should just become a group of people who walk around town and shit in peoples air vents
I'm down.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
high people should be assigned attendants
wait so...it's like an actual thing to masturbate using the detachable shower head? WTF I thought I was being creative!
Me + Nice restaurant + Copious amounts of booze + obscene comments to couples = valentine's day plans
as I was walking out the door her and her roommate started singing "toot it and boot it".. I'm in love
this speak and spell drinking game will be the death of us all.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You told the cashier at McDonald's not to smell the ones cause you had just got back from the strip club. Good deed.
Definitely! I will do that this week. Right now, watching drag queens play with my dad's beard.
I just saw my 7th grade teacher at the club. We had a pretty good talk over drinks. Turns out we both like dancing on tables.
If you think eating a bowl of leftover stuffing and drinking champagne from the bottle in dirty sweats at 9am is sexy... Then yeah, I'm your girl.
Why are there naked heterosexuals in my apartment?
If I wanna spend the whole night tied up and getting railed I'm allowed to do so
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