No touching my privates on the ride to school. Pinky swear.
I either just heard my neighbors having sex or she really agreed with whatever he was talking about.
He said i was a degenerate twofaced catholic slut and a grade a bitch. Quite complimentary really. i guess i shouldn't insult the red wings
I drank mimosas and played bocce ball in the middle of finals week...now i know how Comm majors feel all the time.
It's now 3:30 and the guy I went home with is showering me with shredded cheese. Nbd.
Ive yelled into your vagina. There are few lines we haven't crossed at this point.
We tried lying really still and being really quiet so that he wouldn't notice us before he left the room. Forgot about the glow in the dark condom.
I saw your relationship status and wanted to write "Now you can fuck with some peace of mind that she isn't giving that other guy she met online a handjob."
I have major gossip for you.
Oh no, did you have sex last night?
If I had sex last night I'd probably post it on facebook. It's been that long and I'd be that excited.
I dont know how I should feel about you making a 37 year old come visit you and then making him do the walk of shame from your dorm room...through campus
just yelled CURVEBALL at my nightie because it turned out to be a pair of shorts
Nothing like walk of shaming to the bus stop in your bar clothes at noon and seeing the fire truck you work on drive past with the other shift giving you thumbs up.. Brotherhood at its finest
I think I had Hypothermia but was too drunk to notice.
Andddddd I'm drunk
Andddddd it's Tuesday
That's your opinion.
Replacing my paralegal is easy. Replacing my favorite office fuck toy is a totally different story. Damn him for wanting to better himself instead of being my manwhore
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