both roomates are passed out on the floor. I feel like I'm missing out on crucial bonding time by sleeping in my bed.
I woke up in the penthouse and did lines off the to of the fireplace. This is not real.
i think i scared a bird with my dick
I think she must be bulimic. I mean, every time I see her I know i want to throw up.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Apparently I mistakenly called the hair club for men at 3am... they called me back this morning.
How does me getting a new dildo make you crave olive garden
just let her blow you already, it's practically animal cruelty at this point.
She kicked in my bedroom door in only high-heals with a bottle of wine, announcing it was "cock-o-clock"
Like "oh its Monday, gotta get wasted today!" not "oh its Monday.. Gotta go to class"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Turns out the guy I peed on gave me a ride back to my dorm this morning.
You are a god.
She just told me she thinks she bruised her labia in class
We have a lot of substance abuse to do tomorrow its sleep time
I have 80 very blurry photos of you on a stripper pole...
I woke up with my my shoes on and pants half way off and missing 60 dollars. Please please please tell me you saw me last night.
I've been getting a lot of emails from patron lately for being a great customer. Is that awesome, or should I start thinking about seeking help?
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