I see my mary-anne walkin' awa-y-y! Bow Nahw now new, ne ne ne ne ne, ne ne nehw, ne ne new new Nah dan ah bwawn-now, ba bwan'll buh dada bwiddly doo.
That was supposed to be me air guitaring the solo from More than A Feeling
I feel like dying is the new "adopt an african baby"
Then he told me I had the most beautiful looking vulva
She wanted to watch a Baby Einstein DVD while we fucked. I'm pretty open minded but that felt a little creepy.
omg. if hes just gonna get mad everytime i have sex with one of his "friends" then it was never gonna work out
Why is your name on a gluestick in a plastic baggy stuck to my door?
The birthday girl is bringing her own barf bucket, it is going to be a good weekend.
Dude, you sent that text at 9:44 AM. Who thinks of drugs that early?
Dude she broke four ribs, how does a 110 lb girl break four of my ribs during sex?! It hurts so bad but was so worth it
I'm texting an actual stripper. A male stripper. I dont wanna talk about it yet
I totally OverDed on K2 last night. I felt like I was made of lead and then I had a panic attack.
When we tried to make a video I set the camera to 3sec pictures accidentally so instead of a movie we have a flipbook of our sex.
You did things that should be illegal to a Twinkie and asked strangers to drive you home.
Dude no i feel my liver disintegrating
I am texting my ex and my future boyfriend while eating fish and chips with my current boyfriend... How and when did I become such a terrible person???
Randomize
