All I'm saying, is that being compared to a Muppet is not the end of the world.
Bts the comment you were making during that picture was "look we have penises"
bathroom sex at kohls isnt as trashy as it seems
its like they have never seen someone walk through campus with a plunger
her orgasm sounded like a fucking walrus crying.
Her breakfeast in bed consisted of half a pop tart that I didn't want, and water that I slipped birth control into... Who says chivalry is dead?
I am currently exfoliating my skin with the toilet. We've never been so close.
I found a ladder. I don't know where I am. Gonna climb it. I feel like aladin
I keep telling myself last night was not real, not real, not real. Then I remember I can't move. This hangover is too fucking real.
I thought I was invisible, then some guy flashed his high beams at me and I realized my lights weren't on...not invisible.
Girls at BYU need to learn how to handle a penis. I swear my date last night was trying to pull it off my body to use later.
We played Rock Paper Scissors to see who would have to go down on the other person.
I might attempt to pee into a cup while driving. I'll let you know how it goes.
Don't EVER mix a flaming shot, with a Jello shot.. As good as it sounds flaming Jello is not a good idea
we went to the skate park then back to her house for dinner, and somehow that ended with her making me blueberry pancakes at 2am
Randomize
