Going back to my hometown to drink absinthe with highschool boys. Remind me to evaluate this decision tomorrow.
Using pot as a way to stop crying probably isn't a good sign huh?
Meh, some people pop Prozac, you smoke weed. Po-tay-to. po-tah-to
How was last night?
She looked like Delta Burke in her fat Designing Women days ... and she just left like 2 minutes ago. Right after breakfast.
why is there a picture of someone wearing Tevas with socks taped on the wall?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he showed up at my house with a hand-stiched sweater that said "girlfriend?"
this crazy girl in up in Dennys is going crazy because Bob Saget just texted her.
I just had a flashback to last nights party, I'm pretty sure I told most of the people there that I post a masturbation schedule for an iCal download.
And next time please put a text between discussing my orgasms and discussing your son - that was weird.
some people offered us free beer as long as we shotgunned it and after you shotgunned four without pausing they took their offer back
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She tried to ditch the cab before she payed but she forgot to grab her shoes and wake me up
Idk dude but he said something bout his "dick was gonna be so tan" then he jus jumped out of the car
I just used bulldog clips for nipple clamps. Also, a wooden spoon as a paddle. DYI Domination or Ghetto Bondage?
I threw up through my nose tonight. Happy cinco de mayo
I'm pretty sure my roommate is moving out because her cat likes me better
I can’t tell if I have feelings for him or if my vagina does.
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